All you can do is tri

I love this saying.  It is my new mantra.  It is the only thing that has really clicked in my brain and made me want to wage the war against the moster.  The monster being my doubtful side.  The side that calls it quits early because it’s the easier option.  The side that isn’t strong enough to tough through the hard parts of training.  The side which wins more often than it should. 

I got my first taste of feeding the athlete Sunday.  It felt great to tell myself something and actually have it lift my spirits and make me want to fight.  To make me want to prove the monster wrong.  To tell myself that this WILL make me stronger as long as I finish and run the whole way and believe it. 

The monster moaned that it was raining, cold, and dark.  Alluding that I should feel the same way and that if I stopped it would go away.  I could just call a friend or hop on a bus back to my car. 

The athlete answered that IT would rather be fed.  It wanted to finish strong in two weeks at the half marathon.  It wanted to know it would be able to run the full distance and possibly PR.  It wanted to know the glory of having toughed it out on a crappy day while wearing wet clothes and having tight glutes.  It wanted to confirm that the nutrition plan being utilized that day would enable it to go the distance and feel strong and fabulous at the end. 

Sunday, the athlete was louder than the monster.  For once, it was the monster that was weak.  The athlete made it even sweeter at the end by looking towards future race finishes and envisioning itself there.  The glory of all the hard work, sweat, and tears showing through in the end.

Long live the athlete.

Besides going to the kick a$$ lecture on Saturday.  I also biked for 2 hours with my local tri group.  We kept our HR’s low and I think only went about 25 miles.  Got to meet some new people and talk about training, races, and ethics of sport.  It was a good time.  After the lecture I gorged on a new recipe of Four cheese tortellini with Alfredo sauce, ground turkey spiced with worstershire, garlic, and salt, and then added broccoli to it.  YUM!  So good!  Perfect carbo loading meal for my 13 miler the next day.

After a late start and finally deciding to turn the Seahawks game off (they were winning before I started to watch and then began losing…), I got on my way to my 13 mile run.  Ended up running most of it in the dark along the Burke-Gilman trail in the pouring rain.  I felt really good for the first half.  It was just sprinkling during this part.  Had lots of thoughts running through my mind, occupying it. 

As soon as I turned around to head back, it started pouring.  Yes . . . I know I live in Seattle, but it doesn’t rain like it has been lately.  It’s typically a tolerable drizzle, with maybe a pour down once a month.  It’s been raining so much that Western Washington has been deemed a Federal Disaster area due to the flooding.  Anyhow, my legs began to feel heavy and sort of cold.  Of course I was wearing rain gear.  And of course it didn’t hold up it’s end of the bargain.  This made my run harder due to the extra weight of the water, but I utilized the skills taught the day before.  Rain, darkness, cold - out of my control.  Legs, energy, outlook - in my control.  I reminded myself about my committment.  Telling myself that I’m strong enough and fit enough to get through this.  After that my attitude was very positive.  I chose to feed the athlete, not the monster. 

Towards the end, about the last half mile, I envisioned myself running the last half mile of my HIM next June.  Envisioning my family being there and how excited I would be to have completed the first step in my mission towards IM Canada ‘08.  Then I brought it back to the present and near future and envisioned running up that last hill of the Seattle Half Marathon and running across Memorial Stadium field to the finish line and smiling the whole way.  Maybe it’s cheesy, but it got me to the end of my run and excited about my future races and mental training I practiced.     

I’ve been having a hard time figuring out where to start with my goals and what, in my training, deserves the most attention. 

Today, I went to a great lecture put on by a local cycling club.  The speaker was Carrie Cheadle, M.A., Sports Psychology Consultant from Penngrove, CA.  She basically had us all sit down and write down our goals for the upcoming year and how we planned on going about achieving our goals.  She also went over how to train mentally.  It was very informative.  

If anyone is having a tough time with mental training or it is obsolete, check her out.  www dot carriecheadle dot com

Below is just a portion of what I came away with from the three hour lecture today. 

My outcome goal: Complete the Pacific Crest Half Ironman in June 2007

Potential obstacles:  Injury . . . Procrastination . . . Overtraining . . . Fatigue . . . Over thinking the process.

What can be done to avoid the potential obstacles?  Process goals.

Process Goal # 1 

What: train consistently; Why: it will keep me in line with my goal and injury free; How: work on my schedule & integrate it into my life; When: NOW, everyday.

Process Goal # 2

What: breaking my long term goals into shorter term goals; Why: easier to feel achievement thus far and re-evaluate your path/plan; How: writing down things you want to work on and then develop a plan/strategy for short term goals; When: in the near future. Hopefully this weekend.

Process Goal # 3

What: focus on goal/mission/dream; Why: because it is why you are committing to dedication of training, time, and body; How: incorporate into training as mental strength; When: every training session.

Another important thing I came away with was that I don’t think I have any strengths.  I become the deer in headlights everytime I’m asked that in a book, by my coach, etc.  I dunno…  Once the headlights passed today, I realized that the reason I can’t come up with my strengths is because I’m comparing myself to others and their strengths, and not necessarily compared to how far I’ve come in the sport.  Which still isn’t much, since I’m just now finally able to commit myself and my time to it.  So, I’m leaning towards a “we’ll see…” kind of answer.  The strengths I was able to come up with are that I adapt easily to training.  I have the committment needed.  I’m disciplined and I’m knowledgeable about the sport since I’ve been “studying” it for 7 years now. 

I think in continuation of Process Goal #2, I’m going to just focus on my off-season plan from Rich right now.  And as I discussed with him, I will get a hold of him in February so we can figure out my plan for the 2007 season.   While I’m following his plan, I’ll create my own for mental training, as well as doing more “studying”.  It wasn’t quite as hard as I had made it out to be.  I guess I just didn’t want to miss anything important.     

Today was a day of firsts and of recurring injuries (see Karma paragraph).  I had my first PT appointment and was told I was a mess, but that they were excited to fix me.  My PT, Lisa, is also a triathlete and so she said she was super stoked to work with me.  They sent me home with “homework” to do when I’m at home, work, or in the car.  My hip flexors are very weak and thus do not protect my back.  The major muscles are all okay, except for my tight calves.  Mostly it’s my core that we will be working on.  I’m not allowed to do anything that provokes symptoms.  I can swim, bike and run as long as I’m not having back pain.  So far, so good.  

Today was my first day on Rich Strauss’s Off season training plan.  Went swimming for the first time in a while.  I’ll leave it at that.  Mostly because I can’t remember when I swam last.  However, when I got out there you wouldn’t have been able to tell.  It was like riding a bike.    The community pool I went to was insane.  There were 6-7 people in each lane.  People I asked said it wasn’t usually this crowded.  I placed myself in the slow lane since it had been awhile since I last swam.  There were only three people who belonged in this lane.  I wasn’t one of them.    Four of the seven in my lane swam my pace.  There were definitely two, maybe three who held up most of us.  It was okay though.  It was a nice boost to my confidence that I hadn’t lost much of my form.  I did Rich’s workout and felt great.  Almost like, “That was it?”  But don’t tell Rich.    It was mostly form work, which I could definitely use.  I biked to and from the pool in the small chain ring so as not to work too hard since it was not my biking day. 

When I got home, I got ready for my run and took off at an easy pace.  About 9 mins into my 25 min run, I was having a cynical moment and was wondering why the woman in her car at the intersection I was approaching wasn’t turning already.  The road was clear of cars, but she was too timid and unsure if she should go.  I was ready to go around her, but wondered if she needed an invitation to turn.  Of course when she finally does, there’s a car.  But she was cordial and waited in the middle turn lane before getting into traffic.  Well, right after I see this (looking over my shoulder), I turn back to look at the sidewalk and my left foot lands on the edge of the sidewalk and I roll my ankle.  Yikes! it hurt.  That’s karma for you.  Guess I need to stop worrying about what other people are doing and just do my thing.  I finished my run, by walking the next 10 minutes to let it adapt and “walk it off”.  Now my ankle is sore, but I’ve iced it, elevated it and wrapped it.  Rest is next in the equation of RICE. 

So that’s my first day on an official training plan, although an offseason plan, towards my big day in June ‘07 for Pacific Crest.  There’s more PT to come, but hopefully not many injuries. 

Finally got to see the movie.  Loved it.  I felt as though I was really able to get into the athlete’s psyche and see that they’re just like us.  They have their ups and downs, question what they’re doing, are emotionally vulnerable and human.  I will definitely be adding it to my collection.  And if Peter Reid happens to become single, I’m moving to Victoria.   

I love hearing about peoples journeys towards Ironman.  It’s so inspiring, as well as allowing you to see that you all have the same struggles, dreams, and experiences.  Sometimes I feel like an oddball when talking to friends and family about my IM quest.  As though I’m a foreign entity.  But hearing peoples stories makes me feel at home.  It’s kind of like Nursing in that it has a language of its own.  People are always telling me, “I don’t know how you do it.”  This refers to both Nursing and Triathlon.  It’s definitely a unique goal - or mission as I’ve come to see it.  Even if people don’t understand, it doesn’t deter me.  I just hope that the more I talk about it and the more they ask about it, it won’t seem so odd or foreign.  

When I was in Penticton for IMC this year, I got to meet Paul (Tribro), Libor (BBB), Geoff (PoC) and a few others.  It was so easy to talk triathlon.  It felt like I had just returned from a foreign country and finally got to speak my own language fluently.  I’m really happy to be part of the Trifuel family.  I’ve gotten to meet some fun, motivated people who share the same passion for tri.  Tonight, I got to meet Britt (brittda) before the movie, which we saw together.  She’s full of lots of good info and a very cool person.  All of this is exactly why we need to have some Trifuel get togethers in the future.  (hint, hint Paul) 

Enough babbling.  Time for a 6 mile run.   

Today I had my first visit with my orthopedist regarding my lower back.  I’ve been having issues with it for years.  In 1999, I had a bout of sciatica which caused pain to shoot through my glutes to my calves, making it hard to work my day job where I was on my feet all day, as well as run.  In 2000, I threw my lower back muscles out playing ultimate frisbee.  The MRI said I had degeneration in L4 and L5.  Ended up having cortisone shots in my epidural space, going through a long series of physical therapy, and was unable to do much for a month or so. 

I finally healed up and got back into the swing of things.  Endurance activities carried on with various NSAIDs and ice packs.  I haven’t really had much wrong with my back since.  Recently though, the back pain has returned and I’m not really wanting to return back to my old symptoms.  The muscles in my back are so tight, they’re causing my lower back posture to be sway back-like and adding to the pain.  All of this is why I made an appointment with an ortho doc. 

My doctor is awesome.  In one look at my back with out an xray or MRI, she could tell exactly what was wrong and was able to determine that it half of it stemmed from my feet or rather my arch not being well supported.  This explains my daily foot pain which I thought was the unfortunate beginnings of arthritis.  The lack of support has also caused bunions - yuk, painful ankles, bursitis in my knees, and IT band issues.  My back symptoms of pain when I sit, stand, walk, and run are not just from my foot issues.  It turns out the right side of my pelvis is rotated forward and to the right causing my sacral illiac joint to be pulled forward and thus causing my illiopsoas muscle (two muscles: the psoas major starts at the lumbar portion of the spine and the illiacus starts at the edge of the illiac fossa/inside of pelvis, which both attach at the top of the femur and help to lift the thigh when running) to be extremely tight.  It’s so tight that that as it gets tighter it causes my back to hurt by pulling on other surrounding muscles.  Then, on top of that, the muscles connecting to my spine have twisted my spine toward the left (kind of like when you are ringing out a towel). 

No wonder my back hurts no matter what I do to make it better.  Muscle relaxers helped, but only temporarily.  Heat is the same.  Ice doesn’t release anything, just takes the inflammation away.  Pilates only makes it worse.  Yoga helps with the other affected muscles, but doesn’t fix the problem.  

As I sit at the computer now, I think I might know how my spine has twisted.  The ergonomics of my computer set up in regards to the screen, the keyboard and my chair has my upper body twisted to the left to type on my keyboard and my lower body is facing the screen to the right.  Note to self: work on this.  I might have to buy a new desk.   

My doctor has referred me to physical therapy so that they can undo what has been done over the last 7-8 years.  I also started seeing a massage therapist at a different PT office who is helping me to release the tight muscles by altering my stretching regimen.  I have to hold the stretch for 2 seconds, completely release the muscle, then repeat as long I feel is needed.  Each time I come back to stretch it should release a bit further.  The muscle though has to be completely relaxed by holding it with my hand or a strap. 

I initially made my appointment to ensure that I could make it to next year’s HIM - Pacific Crest in Oregon - and so that the previous symptoms didn’t return.  I’m so glad to have seen her.  I was really close to cancelling because of the new stretching techniques I learned.  I didn’t think I would need to see her.  I’m excited to know my back can be fixed and that I’m taking care of the problem early before getting injured.  I’m a little hesitant to go running though, now that I know what I know, which is why I’m writing this novel. 

To Do List: Buy Superfeet insoles to help correct foot issues; go to my PT appts; stretch better, for longer, and more often; use heat at night to help my back relax; continue taking naproxen; and focus on posture.